Archive for February 10, 2013

Entire contents trademarked TM and copyrighted (c)  by Ryan Carey, 2013. That means that if you want to reproduce or use this material for any reason,  you have to ask me real nice.



LARRY and JUNE enter JUNE’s house by the pack porch door, JUNE a step or two ahead of LARRY as they walk.

JUNE : Still thirsty?

LARRY : Sure, why not?

LARRY closes the back porch door behind him, then continues to follow JUNE.

JUNE : Think I’ll join you on the water train, I’ve hit my limit for tonight.

LARRY : Yeah, at some point I still gotta drive, so —

JUNE half-turns towards LARRY.

JUNE(smiling) : You’re even rustier than I thought — this is absolutely not the time to be thinking ahead like that.

LARRY follows her into the kitchen in silence.

JUNE CON’T : That mighta come out wrong —

LARRY : No, it didn’t.

JUNE motions to a chair at her kitchen table.

JUNE : Have a seat, nervous Nelly.

LARRY pulls two chairs out from the table, nudges them just a bit closer together while JUNE pours water from a pitcher in her refrigerator into two glasses, her back turned to him.

LARRY : Will do.

JUNE : When’s the last time you were even on a date, anyway?

LARRY sits down.

LARRY : A friend o’ mine set me up with a gal he worked with maybe two, three years ago, but that’s about it since I split from my ex.

JUNE closes the refrigerator door and walks a few steps over to the table.

JUNE : So you were married?

LARRY : No, but I was shacked up with a gal for close to a decade.

JUNE : And that ended six or seven years ago, I bet.

LARRY : ‘Cuz that’s when I started smoking again?

JUNE : ‘Cuz that’s when you started smoking again.

JUNE sets LARRY’s water glass down in front of him.

JUNE CON’T : Any drama?

LARRY : She got the house. I got probation.

JUNE chuckles as she sits down.

JUNE : That sounds dramatic alright.

LARRY takes a sip of water.

LARRY : Actually — not really. We were inseparable for a couple years, then spent the next six or seven living in the same space an’ trying despearately to somehow stay out of each other’s way. One day I just came home and found the locks changed. Turned out she had been seein’ some other guy and decided to just move ‘im in. (pauses) One night, I dunno — I just went a little apeshit.

LARRY pauses to take another sip of water.

LARRY CON’T : She’d given me like one box o’ my stuff and the rest was all still inside and I just though, fuck it, I’m goin’ over there to get it. Nobody was there so I busted open a window and climbed in and before I could even get anything much together the cop lights were flashin’. Guess a neighbor had called ’em.

JUNE : Hence the probation?

LARRY takes another sip of water.

LARRY : Hence the probation.

JUNE takes a sip of water.

JUNE : Ever get the rest of your stuff?

LARRY : Never even tried after that. She had more steady income so the house an’ all that were under her name anyway, so I just let it go.

JUNE : Miss her?

LARRY : For a couple years I was too steamed to miss ‘er, then I sorta did for awhile, now if I think about her it’s just (long pause) — nothin’, ya know? I can’t even see how I ever managed ta get so worked up about it.

JUNE takes another sip of water.

JUNE : I wonder how many of us would really recognize our past selves at all if we somehow ran into ’em.

LARRY : Well, we’d know ’em on sight, wouldn’t we?

JUNE(smiling) : Beyond that, simpleton.  You know what I mean.

LARRY takes a sip of water.

LARRY : Yeah, I do. Actually, I think back to the old me and I don’t even like that guy very much.

JUNE : Meaning?

LARRY : Well, like me an’ Linda — that’s the ex — we never did anything fer each other, ya know? We only had one car an’ I never even drove ‘er to work, even though I was pretty much always home. Birthdays, anniversaries — sooner rather n’ later they all became like just any other day. We just kinda occupied the same spot on the earth. Always slept in the same bed, but only our bodies were there, ya know?

LARRY pauses for a long moment before proceeding, looking at his water glass.

LARRY CON’T : Truth be told, it goes a lot further back n’ that, though.

JUNE : Only tell if you want to.

LARRY : I just — it sometimes feels like I never done a decent thing for anybody else in my life.

JUNE takes a sip of water.

JUNE : If you want a pity party for that, take it somewhere else. Sounds ta me like you’ve been a grade-A asshole.

LARRY : No pity. I think you’re exactly right. Like I said — the old me, I don’t much like that guy.

JUNE : Well — don’t let it go ta yer head, but you don’t seem like an asshole these days.

LARRY takes a sip of water.

LARRY : Thanks.

JUNE : Maybe that’s why you’ve turned into such a bundle of nerves. You’re afraid of being an asshole again.

LARRY ponders the thought for a moment, looking at his nearly-empty glass.

LARRY : Never thought about it that way. (pauses) But you might be onto somethin’.

JUNE : Any other deep, dark secrets you wanna get off yer chest? Now’s the time. I’m feeling strangely more attentive than usual.

LARRY : Not really. (pauses) I mean, I was more an asshole outta convenience than anything else. Anybody  I ever was goin’ out with before Linda came along, I’d just cut an’ run first sign o’ trouble. No goodbyes, no nothin’, just sorta stopped returnin’ their calls. Sooner or later — usually sooner — they’d get the point.

JUNE : So — a coward and an asshole.

LARRY takes another sip of water.

LARRY : Or start as the one an’ end up as the other.

JUNE : ‘Least you recognize it now, that’s somethin’.

LARRY : I guess it must be. But what that somethin’ is I couldn’t tell ya.

JUNE : How about — somethin’ I find interesting?

JUNE takes a sip of water and resumes speaking, with a slight grin and twinkle in her eye.

JUNE CON’T : For now, at least.

LARRY leans in awkwardly to kiss JUNE as she sets her water glass down on the table, almost expecting her to pull away, but she leans in and her lips meet his and they engage in a surprisingly long and passionate kiss. JUNE takes her lips away from his first to speak.

JUNE (catching her breath slightly) CON’T : Whew! Not entirely sure where that came from, but —

LARRY finishes his water with a final sip and sets the glass down.

LARRY : I musta made myself sound so good ya just couldn’t resist.

JUNE (giggling slightly) : Yeah, that’s it.

JUNE finshes her water as well, sets it down on the table, and looks at the empty glasses for a moment before turning to face LARRY again.

JUNE CON’T : Done enough thinkin’ for one night? ‘Cuz I sure have.

LARRY stammers with his response for a moment, unsure as to whether or not he’s about to be asked to leave.

LARRY : I — yeah, I guess, I mean —

JUNE cuts him off mid-sentence.

JUNE : Good. Then let’s cut out the awkward next few moments again, an’ all the guessing an’ everything like that, an’ just go upstairs.

LARRY smiles slightly as JUNE stands. LARRY stands a half-second later and follows behind JUNE as she walks toward the light switch, shuts it off, and proceeds out of the kitchen.